It's all true. Lord help us all.

Date:	2005-12-06 19:21
Subject:	More novel plans
Security:	Public
Mood:	anxious

I've been thinking, about my soon-to-be hit novel, about the invisible leprechaun who has to kill a teenaged girl every year and drink her blood to maintain his immortality: it needs a hero.

So what I'm thinking, is that the hero should be someone the general public can relate to and look up to. Like, a writer who still has to live in his parents' basement and use their car, but is supremely handsome and suave with the ladies and badass and shit. He could maybe look like a cross between Stephen King and David Hasselhoff, and he could stab invisible leprechauns to death with his wicked awesome pencils.

He can see the invisible leprechauns that no one else can because he's so much smarter and better then everyon eelse, you see, and because he's the misunderstood hero. Ladies don't want to date him because he's too manly for them to handle, so the offer themselves up for some sweet girl-on-girl action for him to watch instead, since they can handle each other.

...

Gonna have to end this entry now. Something more important just came up.

Date:	2005-12-04 10:16
Subject:	A real bummer
Security:	Public
Mood:	sleepy

I was taking out the trash, as mom requested, when the phone rang. I hate being woken up in the morning and made to do errands, but Mom says she'll start charging me rent for my room if I don't, so I do it.

Anyway, while I was throwing the grbage out, Mrs. Christmas was telling mom that Shannon McKenzie had been found this morning, hanging from a tree. Not much usually happens in a town like Cougar Ridge, so when somebody dies, the news gets to the gossips fast, and they make sure everyone else hears about it within the hour. The daily newspaper is pretty worthless for local news.

Weird how she was found today, a year and a day after Anastasia Lee's suicide. I don't think the police have said whether they think it's murder o suicide yet, since they only found her a couple hours ago.

Me, I'm thining this is gonna work great for my book. An invisible leprechaun who kills one girl every year. Maybe he could drink her blood for to gain his own immortality, that fcould be a sweet angle!

Kinda sad abut Shannon, though. I was planning on lettin her join my harem once she was legal, after I make millions of dollars as an international favorite author. So much for that.

Date:	2005-12-03 14:05
Subject:	A crappy night because of the Templeton sisters
Security:	Public
Mood:	crappy

Drove to the Sonic for some dinner, and the place was closed down already. Didn't think they shut it down this early usually, but maybe it's in rememberance of that Lee girl.

While driving back to mom's place, I saw a police car. I thought I saw my boss's son, Tyler Mawsterson himself, sliding into the back of the car, but it was probably just some drunk high school kid with a mohawk or something.

When I finally got back home, mom was complaining again about how I need a place of my own and I need to start supporting myself now that I'm 30. She just doens't undersatnd that I need a nurturing environment while I do my thing and become a great, multimillionaire writer of fictions. Until then, I have to focus my energies on that, and I can't be expected to cook my own meals or wash my own clotheses or anything like that. Be reasonable, mom!

After I'd been watching cartoons for an hour, Mom told me to take a pecan pie she'd just baked over to the Templeton ladies' house. Two single sisters, living together in that big old house, the shades always drawn... I figured they had some weird lesbian incest thing going on, but mom said there was gossip about how orville had a thing for one of them. I dunno, I never heard orville mention anything about that, and I'm one of his favorite people. He helps me when I'm writing mediaeval period stuff, he already knows a lot of crap about that stuff so I don't have to do any research. I guess that all he has is time on his hands, eing handicapped and all that.

So I was taking this stupid pie over, and it smelled so good I would have taken a piece for myself except Mom would find out like hse always does, and I see this big shadow lunging out of the corner of my eye. I drop the pie, instinctively, worried abut this monster coming at me.

There was a noise that was so creepy my goosebumps had goosebumps, and then it was over. I stepped closer and poked my way into the bushes, and it was just a dog, torn apart real nasty. I don't know what would've done that, but whatever it was was already gone, and I was left with pie on my shoes.

And it was then that I knew, Mom wasn't gonna let me have any beer tonight. That sucks.

Date:	2005-12-02 12:45
Subject:	Afternoon with the boss
Security:	Public
Mood:	annoyed

Mood in Jack's was too somber to discuss my great new novel idea with anyone, so I just took my midday drink and left. When I got back to my job at Masterson's, the owner, Conrad Masterson, was storming abou tand throwing afit. All of us at Masterson's hate it when the big jefe shows up, sticking his nose in all our business. We know how to do our job, go back to your ivory tower and do whatever it is you do there.

I overheard Conrad asking his younger employees if they'd seen his son, Tyler. Kid's a real pothead, and yeah, don't start with the pot calling the kettle black. I know, I know, those days are bhind me now.

On the upside, if Tyler Msterson ever inherits his father's business, we won't have to worry about that one throwing these tantrums at us. He'd be too busy flashing a smile and trying to convert us all to atheism.

Of course, i don't plan on working in a department store for the rest of my life, not even the biggest one in town. I thin this novel is gonna be the big one, the break I've been looking for. Then I'll shove it down Mr. Masterson's throat. But I think, instead of vampires, which've been done to death, i'm gonna go with leprechauns instead. Yeah, that's gonna be the ticket, just you wait and see.

I've been developng my next novella in my head and today the best idea came to me: what about a novel based on the demise of Courgar Ridge's own Ana Lee? It would be a detective murder mystery with all the bells and whistles.

Of course, beng a Bill Stevens story, its gotta have some great, unexpected twist. I'm thinking maybe of trowing in sme vampires. It seems like vampires are pretty big right now, so I could cash in on that. Maybe I'll ask for some people's thoughts on this idea when I visit Jack's Place later today for my midday coffee.

I'm pretty exicted about this one, I think it may be the big one, the one that finally gets my genius and mastery over the craft of English language recognized. All I need now is the title, something that leaps out and grabs you and forces you to read the work. I'll have to work on that. Maybe orville will have some nice old literary refernce I coul duse, he's usually pretty good with that ort of thing.